Reins of Fire: A Barbie Horse Adventures (Riding Camp) Retrospective - Article
by Issa Maki , posted on 01 April 2023 / 6,575 Views
After running the gamut of FromSoftware and Team Ninja games over the past year or so, it's time to mix things up. No offense to them, but after all the borderline unfair blockstrings, one-hit kills, and lop-sided boss fights, put me out to pasture for a spell. This is usually just an expression, but to some of us it's become a way of life. Sometimes, the manliest action one can undertake is embracing their inner girl. And while Carl Jung might get what I'm laying down, I'll try to offer a more detailed explanation for the rest of us.
The small island of Equestria is in the throes of turmoil: children have lost their toys; cabins go unpainted and abashed of their looks. Buoys lay strewn about the beachside, as raspberries grow in fields with abandon, escaping the confines of dessert pastries. Amidst this backdrop, a supercomputer installed on an alien artifact reacts to the will of a lonely child, creating the mother-figure of humanity: few know her as the 'Antitype', but all know the name 'Barbie' – and the burden to save us all falls on her shoulders.
At the risk of spoiling everything, the basic premise of Barbie Horse Adventures is to traverse across Equestria as the title character in search of mystery and intrigue. Though one would never guess, a decent amount of its mechanics are surprisingly sound; the horse riding is solid, various side quests give Barbie ample reason to explore the island's open-world, and its audio fidelity is impressive for a budget title – there's even a smidgen of character development to be found for dedicated players. It's not perfect, but I can honestly say that I've paid more for games half as memorable.
First of all, I know this is primarily an equine-based experience, but we have to begin by addressing Barbie's movement on-foot. Now, I've played games as a were-person, rear-wheel drive hatchback car, Queen Anne's Revenge, and former NBA superstar Shawn Kemp – and Barbie is by far the tankiest of the bunch. With no camera control, users will feel like they're steering Barbie to her destination, rather than anything resembling nimble movement. I assume this was done to keep the focus on horse riding, but Terran-based questing isn't nearly as enjoyable as it could be. Just remember to take into consideration any petite blondes you run across in real life, because they apparently have starship nascels installed that nobody else can see.
Peppered throughout Riding Camp are the trademark 'Barbie-isms' we've all come to enjoy over the decades. While it's nothing quite as controversial as “Math is hard” (which I never understood, because math is hard), a few choice phrases from our leading lady exist. From “Horses love to eat hay!” to “Sparkles mean I can do things!”, players are going to be walking away with at least one quote in their back pocket. “Why is there so much trash on the track?” – that's the right question, Barbie, and its answer has to do with why Mrs. Roberts stands in the same spot every day, or the fact that somebody else is controlling your movements in a simulated reality. Keep going down this line of thought young lady, and you'll be waking up bald and inside of a goo pod.
Horse riding can be broken down into three sections: Ribbon Challenges, maintenance, and open-world exploration. Each has its part to play, coming together in a satisfactory gameplay loop.
Ribbon Challenges are the equivalent of main story missions, bestowing stronger horses upon victory. Endurance races, cross-country riding, and the like ultimately boil down to a series of time trials testing your mastery of equestrianism. The 'vaulting' competition is a great test of one's digital depth perception and may take the proper horse upgrade to conquer. Personally, I thought the cross-country section was designed quite well; as long as you equip any remaining Power Magics and abuse System Id whenever possible, the final boss should go down without an issue.
Maintenance involves feeding, watering, and properly grooming your selected steed, as to maintain optimal performance. Red Dead Redemption 2 fans will be passingly familiar with this manner of upkeep and its effect on gameplay. Even a Holsteiner can have difficulties besting the time of a well-kept Palomino; it may sound tedious (and it is), but that's the point. As we'll see, Barbie Horse Adventures admirably endeavors to instill some degree of responsibility throughout its fanbase.
Riding Camp's supplemental content consists of galloping around its open-world in search of good deeds to perform. The bulk of these are fetch quests for the denizens of Equestria Island, but some outliers of note (along with collectibles) can be discovered. Mucking stables (i.e. cleaning up poop) is a decision I applaud the developers for including; it's a dirty job and isn't fun, but it's part of the cause and effect that comes with having a pet. There's even a multi-stage quest ala the Biggoron Sword from Ocarina of Time for completionists. The reward isn't as nice, but Riding Camp's strongest story beats are found within the tale of Hannah Roberts, so it's well worth the investment.
Successfully completing tasks earns Barbie camp credits to spend on new outfits and horse-related paraphernalia. And while there's a fair amount of content, other than aesthetics little reason exists to unlock anything. Some passive bonuses would have been nice, because as things stand spending cash feels more like busy work instead of making meaningful progress.
In fact, my two biggest complaints with Barbie Horse Adventures are that it's too short and far too easy. A 100% playthrough can be achieved in roughly 5-7 hours, but what I'm most critical of is how little challenge the game presents. After clearing its final level with over 6 minutes to spare, let's just say I'm glad I grew up in the era I did. In the absence of skill, perseverance, conflict, and any adversity, how can one possibly grow to attain enlightenment?
The sole offering in the 'Extras' section is a trailer for the CGI-animated movie Barbie and the Diamond Castle, which I honestly had mixed feelings about. In an effort to assuage whoever Stacie is (I'm not up-to-date on my lore) Barbie recites the following story: after offering her jam sandwich to a needy passerby, Barbie/Liana and her friend Teresa/Alexa are gifted a mirror, which has become the prison of a girl named Melody. Shortly after, the trio are besieged by the Evil Lydia, who seeks Melody's key to unlock the Diamond Castle and become the sole Muse of Music.
While it starts off promising, Diamond Castle eventually falls victim to the predictable trappings of children's programming. I also take umbrage with Barbie straight up lying to the innkeeper in order to get her way. I appreciate that she, Alexa, and their puppies needed food to eat, but deceit is not a value we should be teaching our youth. Regardless, I'm excited to recite the song 'Connected' to my best friend the next time we see each other; I don't know how he'll feel about it, though I have a hunch the dress and heart necklace will present more questions than answers.
There's an old saying: 'don't look a gift horse in the mouth'. It's hard not to apply it here, even if it is a little on the nose (or in this case, muzzle). Barbie Horse Adventures: Riding Camp would never have won Game of the Year, but can easily earn a place in your heart; it's one of those games that's better than the original price tag ($19.99) would have you believe. Barbie's sage-like wisdom sums it up best: “Memories are so special!”. She's right, don't take them for granted – create as many as possible with everyone that loves you while there's still time!
Because once the opportunity is gone, you'll wish you had taken it.
